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My parents both have passed. We did anything and everything we could to make theoir lives happy till the end. My In-laws are in their 80’s, in better health than us, active, living a lavish life style while we’re hanging on by a string. Their home is pristine while our little apartment is a mess. My husband is unemployed due to 4 layoffs in 2 years as a research scientist. I’m on disability. They call us the scourge of the earth because we are causing “their” tax dollars to go up. They have traveled the world in the past 20 years and continue to do so. They ignore their only grandchildren, do not even respond when they send them cards, gifts or phone them. We respect them to the best of our ability (difficult when constantly hammered by extremeist conservative views and hatred) and stay in touch. My husband spent months making a handmade wooden gift set for his parent’s anniversary. It’s been packed away with the complaint, “I have too many bowls & cutting boards. What do I need this for?”. Their attitude is they came to this country with nothing and fought their way up the ladder (with help of people they have conveniently forgotten about) and lived the “American Dream” so we just are not trying hard enough. To this day they call my husband (their only child) a failure for not becoming a doctor. A Ph.d Scientist was not good enough. They claim the “recession is just a conspiracy therory against their party”. They may eventually run into health problems, but seeing as how their siblings lived to 100+ I guess we still have awhile. Their final days are planned and paid for and do not include us other than a neighbor will call us to let us know. We offer to visit, but are told they are too busy with all their clubs and friends. How about “Save Us from his parents” This is not something new due to age or infirmity…they even refused to raise my husband (their only child), bringing his grandmother over from Germany to do it for them.
Otherwise for “the average” elder. I couldn’t agree more. Maybe we’ll have our grown children watch this in hopes they will remember the sentiments in another 18 years.
Dot -Thanks for your blog posts – they are so thoughtful, compassionate, informative. It is an honor for me to work with Hoarders – they are a special population of people. I appreciate all that you do and I learn a lot from the shows.